Cunnilingus: The best place to eat out

It’s on the tip of my tongue

Cunnilingus - it’s a tongue-twister. It’s also not the sexiest-sounding of words, something you might have last heard stuttered from the lips of a mortified supply teacher in Sex Ed. And if it’s nothing but Latin to you, it’s because it is. But what is cunnilingus? And is there something else we, god help us, can call it?

If you’re not jamming with the jargon, some synonyms might help: eating pussy, going down, licking out, lip service, carpet munching, dining at the Y or - shudders - clam diving. To stop beating around the bush: it involves using your tongue and mouth to stimulate a vulva.

Along with annilingus (the anus) and fellatio (the penis) it’s a form of oral sex; if we head back to the Latin for a hot second, it stems from ‘cun’ (vulva) and ‘lingere’ (to lick). It actually used to be used to describe the person, rather than the act. A cunnilingus was, literally, a ‘cunt-licker’. So how do you go about becoming one, then?

From lips to lips

So you want to know how to perform cunnilingus, but you’re not sure where to start? Not, necessarily, between the legs. A great way to begin any oral sex is by slowly getting to your target, rather than rushing there. Aim high, working your way down from lips, to neck to stomach, brushing key erogenous zones - nipples, nape, navel - along the way. Or, vice versa - work your way up from the toes, caressing your partner from their legs up to their inner thighs with the power of your mouth.

By this point, if you’re lucky, they’ll be turned-on, teased and ready to be tasted some more. If you really want to impress, gently latch onto your partner’s outerwear or underwear and slowly slip them off with your mouth. And if you’re able to negotiate the zip and buttons of a pair of skinny jeans with your teeth, well, we’ll take some tips from you.

Giving: Let’s spell it out

You’ve mastered the foreplay and you’re ready to tuck into some eating out; now, let’s help out to eat out. As with any sex, the key is being as responsive and communicative as possible, so take it slow and pick up on your partner’s cues. Plus, you may have a tried-and-tested method that works wonders for you, so always take any sex advice with a heap of salt. If, though, you’re still left wondering how to perform oral sex on someone with a vulva, here are a few pointers:

No need for an A-Z

Ah, the famous alphabet trick. You may have heard of it - either behind the bike sheds or in an old-school glossy mag - and tried it out yourself. It claims that there’s nothing more pleasurable for a receiver than spelling out the entire alphabet with your tongue. While it does promote variation, leave the wordplay and try out different movements - circular, up-and-down or side-to-side - without pre-occupying your mind with what comes after D.

Try a few places

The clitoris is queen. For sure, a pointed tongue gently thrust inside your partner’s vagina can be mind-blowing, especially if you’re well endowed in the mouth-muscle department. But, for the majority of women, the clitoris is the key to climaxing, so make sure to show it some love. Don’t forget, though, you’ve got a whole buffet to contend with - including both labia to lick - so make sure to get an extra helping.

Finger food

The beauty of cunnilingus? You’re totally hands free - ready to use them as you please. Instead of keeping them gripped to your partner’s thighs like you’re holding the handlebars on your first bike, use them to cup breasts or playfully dig into legs. If you really want to take it up a level, go inside your partner with your fingers, curling them up and pressing on their G-Spot while working away with your tongue.

Receiving: you’re good enough to eat

And if you’re the receiver? You lucky thing! As with any form of sex, the most important precursor to precum is feeling relaxed - so make sure you’re comfortable and keep talking, even if it’s a bit muffled for one of you. You’re being treated here: so if you want to lay down and enjoy the show, go for it. Or, if you prefer, grab onto their hair and guide their tongue to the sweet spot, pressing down if you’re both keen for you to do some dominating.

Remember, too, you don’t have to be back on the bed; try out some different positions and find what feels best. If you’re getting hungry, head for their penis or vulva and try out a bit of sixty-nine; dinner for two, after all, is better than a meal for one. Or, if you’re feeling like you want to take control, get them to lie down and sit above or on top of their face, riding their tongue to that special, heady place in the heavens.

Heart in your mouth

Since great cunnilingus involves complex movements centered on the clitoris, plus the ability to use your hands, it’s often one of the most potent sources of pleasure. Only around 1 in 5 people with a vulva can orgasm through penetrative sex alone, so any play which involves the clitoris is a winner, and a great way to give them your undivided attention.

Do it right, and you’re likely to get tongues wagging; and, if you’re really lucky, a booking from a repeat diner. Now that you’re an expert, too, and the word alone isn’t that much of a tongue-twister, give this one a go: Can cunning cunnilingus lingo cause lingering conundrums? Conceivably; but congenial cunnilingus can also consistently cause consecutive coming…